Movies to Grow With

January 02, 2014  |   Blog   |     |   0 Comment

SEX SPELLSSomebody asked me through Facebook whether I had any ways to help with an overactive libido. It made me think about 2 movies I have seen recently about sex/ porn addiction. Thanks for Sharing is a comedy/ drama about 4 people struggling with sex addiction using the 12-Step program for recovery.They demonstrate the ups and downs of the recovery process and I think it is wonderful that films are being made about this dark, difficult stuff. The community gets to hear and see a little about this dysfunction. And maybe it becomes less isolating. There are many critics of this movie. They’ve all got good stuff to say. But I have recommended both these movies to clients wanting to know more about their own sexual process and /or their partners.

Don Jon is a movie about a young man in his late 20’s who loves his porn along with his apartment, his wheels, his clothes etc., He loves porn more than sex with real women–even drop dead, gorgeous ones. His scoring system is applauded by his bros and his technique for picking up women earns him the nickname Don Jon.He visits his Italian Catholic family every Saturday, goes to confession about all his infidelities, receiving forgiveness for his sins, and then attends Mass. He confesses the porn and is proud of himself when he is able to quit for a week. The priest is not too impressed and requires him to do the same penance as before.

An older woman whom he meets at school challenges him to loose himself in another person during sex rather than loose himself in porn. Of course they experiment with all that together and we see a picture of sex that seems organic, connected and intimate. He calls it the best sex of his life. We should all be so fortunate to beĀ  that open during sex.


  • If you would like to follow up with more information about affairs please read Esther Perel's new book. Some of her ideas are included in ...

    The State of Affairs – Rethinking Infidelity